Still Needing Help

Make it to Meetings

A friend and I were standing outside of the AA biker club the other night, talking about recovery meetings. We were not talking about the meeting we were about to attend, who was chairing the meeting, or which meetings we preferred to attend. The conversation was all about our need to attend meetings, even after long-term sobriety.
Walt has over two decades of living clean and sober. When I first met him, I was very impressed, hearing what he had to say in meetings, and his eloquent appeal to those in the room to live in freedom, and to follow directions out of the hell they’ve given themselves to. He nearly lost his life to drinking and drugging. Walt learned the secret to sober living, and passed it on to others, like me.He said to me, “Keith, I’m still broken. I still need fixing, I need to hear what is said in these rooms.” His past was dark, full of sorrow and hurts. He never wants to return there, so he said, “I still need to come here.”

I share that sentiment with him. We have broken pasts that have had a great effect on our present and future. That effect is to infect as many as we can with the hope of living free from addiction, to stop attending meetings to just get help, and be a help. We both know we walk the razor’s edge when we stop attending, serving, and praying. Many have. Many have died because they did. He and I know we have to keep humility as an aim each day, asking God for help.

“There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of short comings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it….there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.” 

The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg.25
Thanks for reading, God bless and keep you all.

3 thoughts on “Still Needing Help

  1. Thanks for sharing , Keith. There is something so vulnerable about this, about still needing to attend meetings .. .about me still needing to sit at His feet each day . ..that brings tears of thankfulness and gratitude. Praying for God to keep me humble and thankful. God bless!

    • Oh Debbie, so good to hear from you! I hope all is well, and hope you’re back at it soon. Thanks for your thoughtful words. I do not believe we should ever move beyond that place at His feet. If we grew spiritually taller than a massive oak tree, always see ourselves as a twig struggling to grow. Humility is Jesus present in our lives. Be well, and blessed!

  2. “If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

    Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us — sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”

    Page 83-84 Alcoholics Anonymous~

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